I don’t know how many of you guys that read my blog have ever heard me speak of my oldest son’s birth. He was born on Christmas Day 9 years ago. I was admitted into the hospital at midnight Christmas Eve.
Fast forward to today. Our oldest son has been our hardest son to raise. He’s very emotional, strong-willed and just down right pig headed (I’m sure he gets it all from his dad – NOT!) We have days that both my husband and I are ready to throw up our hands, throw in the towel with certainty that we have NO IDEA what we are doing as parents.
Yesterday was one of those days…..a rough one.
So I pray and I pray hard for this son of mine. I pray that God would chase him down with all that He is and grab a hold of his heart and make it His own. I pray for a sensitivity to the Holy Spirit and to others. I pray for a child who loves the Lord with all that he is.
And I fall back on the words the Lord spoke to me that night in the hospital when he was born. I knew God had chosen Christmas Day for a purpose. I was 11 or so days late and had such a peace that he would come when God wanted him to. The night after he was born I was awake, trying to figure out the nursing thing, and asking over and over, “Why Christmas Day Lord? I know you chose it for a reason”. I had praise and worship music playing, it was dark, my first born was in my arms and I felt God’s answer to my question as if He was standing beside my chair……”Because he is my gift to you. I never want you to forget that He is MY gift.”
I began to cry. Wow. For God to speak to me so clearly, choose a night so holy, and orchestrate it all for me to know……
Indescribable….
God knew that 9 years later I’d still be relying on those words from Him. Our first-born has been our most difficult child since day one. He had colic as a baby and didn’t sleep for almost 3 months. We prayed, the church prayed, we cried, begged my mom to quit her job and come stay with us and had lots of help. Friends helped with him for most of the first year of his life. It was a blessing.
Still today I remember the Lord’s words to me as I struggle with parenting my first born. When I’m in the aftermath of a hard day of parenting knowing I have no idea what I’m doing I remember the words…
“He is MY gift to you.”
And I’m encouraged to keep fighting the fight and doing battle on behalf of my son because I know there is one out there who wants his heart and hates him with all that he is. And I know the one I serve is bigger, stronger, mightier, holier and is all about changing me, my husband and our family as we raise one of “His gifts to us”.
They truly are God's gift to us and stretch us further than we ever could have stretched without them.
Praying for ya!
My third just turned nine this year, he has been many challenges, for different reasons than you, but still a challenge. It is amazing how we grow with God's gifts. I will keep you in my prayers. What a beautiful gift on Christmas day, WOW.
Your pictures are beautiful and it looks like these beautiful outdoorsy seasons will be very enjoyed by your household! If you plan to do any reading for the summer, our oldest just published, you can find links at my blog. I will keep you and yours in my prayers. Keep sharing pictures, they are awesome! Hugs!
It's an encouragement to read this post. I have two girls, both who are extremely strong-willed and very difficult. They're only two and three years old. It may sound like poor comfort from me, but it is so encouraging to know that I'm not the only mom who feels like pulling her hair out. I'm not the only one who has days that are so hard I just want to ask "why"? It's wonderful to hear your story of God's gift to you. Too often, we forget to see our children as gifts, and begin to know them only as burdens. Thanks you so much for sharing that story. We all need to hear more stories like that, to know that God's love and promises are real and working in our lives. God bless you.
Mama J.
Julie, thanks for sharing your story of your son. It sounds like it has been quite the trial for you, but you approach it with such a strong heart and strong faith.
My son had colic, too, and didn't sleep through the night until he was 9 months old. Each of my kids do present their own challenges, but we love them for the flawed little beings that they are. They just try our patience just a bit from time to time to time…
Stacy
I could have written much of this post about my 3rd. She's our gift, and can be so passionate, sweet, caring, loving, helpful, joyful….or, not. You never know from one day to the next what you will get. When I'm crying out to the Lord, He continually says, "Just love her." Some days it's awfully hard to know what that love should look like. She is an beautiful gift, and the Lord has shown us much through her. I pray the same prayer you do. Thanks for sharing, and reminding me that I"m not alone.
Letitia